these last few days i’ve had trouble eating, which while not entirely unusual since it’s happened before but still a bit odd because for me the physical sensation of anxiety is usually in my chest and throat and not my stomach but for a few days i’ve been so anxious it moved to my stomach as well, i haven’t had an appetite at all and eating makes me nauseous
so i’ve skipped a lot of meals and eaten smaller portions than usual and it’s kind of weird because usually eating is a coping mechanism for me, i snack for comfort all the time, probably more than i should. and now food repulses me i am literally sitting in bed with a bag of crisps i know i like and i can’t eat them even if i’m actually hungry.
so today i presented my graduation project to a room full of people even if i was anxious as hell, wrote a speech that i’m going to hold tomorrow, bought a ticket for prom, and most important of all; i came out to dad. he took it really well and even if i knew he’d be accepting it still feels like a huge relief to have told him about this.
all in all, it’s been a productive day and i’m sort of proud of myself for managing to do all this while my anxiety is sky rocketing. i wish i could say i feel better right now because of things going well, but i’m not. it sucks but it’s not like i can do anything about it so i’m not going to feel guilty about it.